It's possible that men branched off into different species without anyone noticing. Everyone likes to be their individual selves, yet, for most males at least, a secret meeting was called at one point to box and brand everyone with a Y-chromosome. Inevitably, you'll come into romantic contact with a fella in one of these showcases, and to help make your gift-buying easier, we experts at the Men's Gift Company will help identify the patterns and behaviours to make your buy a breeze:
The Music Lover
His taste of tune defies all notions of time and space. Whether raised on a diet of Crowded House or Coolio, he will inevitably grow up to appreciate any and all music that gets a thumbs up from critics, and fails to sell anywhere near a few thousand copies. He isn't aware of the first five BBC radio channels, and received the biggest freak out when he saw High Fidelity for the first time - scared that someone had been following him taking notes . Maybe he can play an instrument, or just has one as a permanent ornament in his room. Either way, you'll want him to wear something that compliments his love of music, and shows everyone that its not just a geeky hobby you put up with, but a full time commitment.
The Funny Guy
Since the day he was laughed at (sorry, with) at school, he's always seen himself as a potential arch nemesis for Batman. He does stand up that no one else will ever see, performs with an improv group that is always 'starting to get some attention' and will deny any instance in which he laughed at an Adam Sandler movie. He'll never be a George Carlin, Doug Stanhope, Jim Norton or any other of these strange names you would never have heard had you not dated him, yet he makes you laugh like no other person can, and you always want him to have a novelty cufflink or ironic letter opener at hand at all times.
The Outdoors Man
You never knew someone could love the countryside so much before meeting this man, nor that you'd ever end up eating so much pheasant. Walks, hunting, fishing, walks, nature drives, walks, riding, walks, walks and walks are things you dread when it comes time to leave your familiar urban surroundings for a week or two so he can indulge in all manner of expensive hobbies. Rather than appease his whim for a new fishing rod or gun slip, make sure he looks the part when he partakes in these activities (that's what you think it might be all about anyway...)
The Class Topper
Since he first took you out to dinner, all you've known since is luxury. Rarely seen outside of a sweater vest or polo jumper, this odd spin-off to the previous sir never takes the quick and cheap option. His phonebook has three celebrities to each family member, his drivers require their own drivers, and he insists that every drink in his house (from Armenian wine to apple juice) come in an ornate gift box. Whilst his country club gives off a suspicious cult vibe, its easy to appease that and all his fancies with trinkets to keep him atop his high horse.
The Style Disciple
For starters, he has more pairs of shoes than you do. If fashion were his religion, he'd be in the front row every week to show of his threads to the congregation, and whether you drag him to a monster truck rally or out of bed at 5am, he'll never accept any excuse to dress lazily. He can be the most troublesome of our five to buy for, but with the guidance of his equally metrosexualized friends, 50 or so men's style magazines and a certain Men's Gifts Company, you can help him in his quest in dressing to impress.